Normally, Squirmish: The Videogame of Brawling Beasties costs 27 quarters, 2 dimes and 4 pennies (or 699 pennies!). For a limited time (Jan 27 - Feb 3), you can get it for only 6 quarters, 2 dimes and 4 pennies (or 174 pennies)! That is a savings of 21 quarters (or 525 pennies)!
Honestly, we don't care much about the dang quarters... it's really those pennies we are in it for.
Really, could you please just pay us with 174 pennies?
You could probably find that in your recliner, judging by the holes in your overall pockets.
Can you believe most people want to GET RID of their pennies? The FOOLS!
If someone offered you 1 egg for a dozen eggs, would you take it? Of course not! Yet every day, people are offered 1 quarter for 25 pennies... and, improbably, they think they are getting a good deal!
Honest Abe Lincoln!
It's no wonder they put him on the penny. The best president we ever had, what with the beard, and the long-armed boxing punches, and the hilarious hat made out of a genuine dead rodent. It's only natural they would want to put Abe on the coin they mint the most of! Not sure why they left off the hat. They should really put the hat on the back.
But to be as honest as Honest Abe Lincoln... it is not the glory of Abe alone that makes us want your pennies. It's the copper! For copper is one of the best conductors of ELECTRICITY.
You just try and wire a makeshift toaster with all your fancy quarters when the bread wars come! We'll be sitting on our pile of pennies happily watching butter melt on a toasty slice of sourdough, laughing. Laughing! Between the tears, we'll be laughing our guts out, hot-buttered-crumbs-a-flyin' everywhere!
Until then, why don't we play some Squirmish, yes?