Greetings, cuddle-deprived lifeforms,
Our sensors confirm that the recent Abduction Update has made a huge impact! Thanks to your immediate feedback, we applied a few patches to fine-tune everything. Your extraterrestrial kidnapping, gas station-running and general alien shenanigans should now run smoother than ever.
Now it's time to take a breather and embrace a fluffy someone who has traveled light years to meet you in person.
He came from outer space and now he’s here to keep you company: Get your own mini Shlorp for late-night cuddles, dream land explorations, and other adventures you have on your intergalactic mission plan. Longing for your new best friend?
Nothing feels better than hugging your Shlorp plushie after a long day of dealing with annoying humans.
The Shlorp plushie is all you need:
Soft and snuggly
In perfect travel-size
Ready to fool everyone but you with two changeable masks!
The Shlorp plushie can now be pre-ordered on the Makeship website. You can find all information on production terms, pricing, and delivery there. Please note that only if we reach a threshold of 200 pre-orders, the plushie will go into production.
Alien HQ Disclaimer: The following content is still being calibrated in our lab. Please expect further adjustments. Everything shown here is a work in progress and may change before it is approved for deployment to Earth.
When I was a young boy
Dad took me into the city
To see a human marching band
He said, "Son, when you grow up
Would you be the researcher
Of the low IQ, abductees and probees?"
Get back in touch with who you truly are with the new emo hairstyle.
More alt looks are being synthesized as we speak.
Many of you glow heads have completed Invasion Stage 1 and are eagerly waiting for what's next... We can only reveal so much: You will wonder "does it stack?"
Here's an unpolished (and censored) prototype of what we are working on right now for Invasion Stage 2.
Invasion Stage 2 will build on your progress made in Invasion Stage 1 with more Invasion Stages scheduled for the game's full release.
You are right when you say that an ever-expanding gas station needs a broad range of products. That is why we proudly present you a preview of what will be hitting your shelves soon! Get your hands on the latest products by Dontcare Pharma (certified as "alright" in 3.5 galaxies).
The Goopster consumption of our engineers is more than disturbing, but their peak productivity levels enable them to cram a lot more fun extras into the upcoming update...
We can't wait to show you what else will materialize!
Our data confirmed a severe goods logistics issue also reported by you as "how on Earth should I move all of this stuff around?" The solution: green Universal Boxes that were deployed with the latest update. They can be taken from and placed back at the Universal Box dispenser which you can buy in the Construction Menu’s Decoration Tab.
Answer: You can have a maximum of 150 Universal Boxes spawned at the same time. We’ve capped this number to help ensure smooth gameplay across a wide range of hardware. Since your gas station can never have more than 150 Universal Boxes at once, one Universal Box dispenser is already enough to reach the limit.
However, having several dispensers placed around your store and storage can of course be more convenient, so you can access them more quickly when you want to grab or dispose of a box.
Rearranging your storage while the F.A.R.T. is at work is easy with the Universal Boxes.
Answer: The F.A.R.T. is unable to use the Universal Boxes to give you a chance to rearrange your products while the restocking robot is doing its job.
We’re always open to feedback on this system and how we could potentially improve it!
In case you missed last week's news: another team here at Cybernetic Walrus has been working on a smaller project that we as a studio run alongside Roadside Research. It's a solo-player incremental card collecting game where you are on the mission to complete your collection by ripping booster packs! So many cards to discover, so many binder slots to fill... Are you ready to scratch that collector's itch?
There are countless ways to set up your gas station, arrange your shelves, and display your products. To the delight of Alien HQ, some of you have truly mastered the ancient human art of product placement. Here are a few of our favorite case studies:
Wall decorations help even the most low IQ customers find your products as showcased by OZGfromG.
Humans enjoy "ambience". And what screams "ambience" more than Brenda? Cheers, Cookiebird!
Fresh produce and bread are so much sought after that they need their own section as bibi perigosa knows!
Cereal, biscuits, and sardines... What else do you need for an Earthly breakfast? VuemX knows best!
Sev07 shows that a bit of chaos combined with a nice shelf layout is all you need to keep the humans happy.
Only an inviting facade makes humans feel like at home (and watson is here to make it sparkle)!
According to kava, a Gnurp shrine is a must-have for every undercover hide-out.
You can never have enough Gnurp, right, Starrnotmikey?
A few plants, a few dogs, ... Otter is a master in making customers feel too cozy for their own good.
Seshaaat loves to tell customers about super prices to approach shelves and... get super probed! Got inspired to ramp up your shelving game? Great! Can't wait to see more of your extremely human gas stations in the Steam Forum or in our official Discord community!
Sending you greetings from the star cluster next door,
Alien HQ