Our Shareholders, CEOs, and skittish lapdogs are happy to share with you a heart-warming story of our Founder as part of the 'Company History Month', a brand-new 2D stickfighting game mode available right now.
The playthrough of the aforementioned mode is mandatory for all employees, as stories of the Founder's origins are core to our brand alignment strategy and serve as an ethical compass for all.
In the case that you are unable to watch our beautiful explainer, here are the key takeaways:
Company History Month explores the rise of our Founder from an orphaned newborn to the greatest businessman of our times.
The currently active (and any subsequent) Stick It To The Stickman sale is a perfect opportunity for you to invest in Stickman Stocks now!*
The price increase is imminent. This is not a warning, just good business. As a wise man once said, "Seven bucks is basically five bucks.
Foreign Manufacturing remains in production. Delays caused by tariffs, sabotage, and union whispers.
Level Builder localization has been completed, so we can more effectively outsource labor.
*This is not investment advice. Please speak to a financier. Do not take any selfies with financiers. Why would you do that?